Vodka makes it go away

I'm sitting in my apartment, recovering from the lingering effects of last night's consumption of alcohol with a glass of vodka-and-lemonade and thinking about what it is about me that makes it hard for me to tell people how I feel. I'm incredibly verbal -- could talk all night, in fact, and often do. But when it comes to talking about my feelings I'm a big, fat failure.

I try to tell people the good things about them, what they mean to me, how they hurt me and I fuck it up. I don't do it too often anymore for that very reason. But sometimes I have moments of cloudy rationale where I think, "Ok, this time I can pull it off. Honesty is good, right?" And in that moment I scare the crap out of whoever it is I've decided to be honest with.

Anyway, vodka might make the memory of what I've recently said and felt go away. So glug, glug, glug. Talk to you later.