Shaking it off

I've been feeling like a fool lately and that's no good. What's been making me feel so foolish is my feelings for other people. I'm normally not very good at showing them. When I do I always feel like I've allowed that particular person to see a chink in my armor. And if they know they can get past my armor then they can hurt me. Stupid, huh?

Anyway, I'm shaking it off. I have a good life and I'm going to go back to enjoying it, goddammit. I'm going to eat at Auntie Mame's banquet, corny as that sounds. I used to do that really well. Other people used to be jealous of my life. The only new thing I'm going to add to the equation is that I'm not going to be ashamed to cry or show that I can be vulnerable anymore. It's not so bad, right? I am a girl, last I checked. Girls are supposed to be at least a little vulnerable, right?

I should point out that don't think I'll ever be one of those girls who sobs over Nicholas Sparks novels and draws little hearts when they dot their i's, but baby steps, right? I can at least stop worrying that showing someone that they've made me happy or sad means that they will hurt me. Emotions aren't all bad and not everyone is an asshole. Some people won't take advantage of me and hurt my feelings. At least I hope that's true.

I'm going to get up off my lazy ass, get dressed and going shoe shopping now. (Ah, how I love being a cliche.) And I promise to be less of a sad sack next time I write one of these things.