Canoodling

NOTE TO READERS: I have been questioned about my use of CAPITAL LETTERS and mullllllllllltiple letters in the middle of words. The capital letters would denote a stress on that particular word as in "What kind of JACKASS can't figure out what that means?" and the extra letters in a word means that I have enlongated the pronunciation of that word, as in "I am toooootally not being sarcastic right now." Please read on accordingly.

Interesting tidbit in Metro today, the paper for cheap people on the go. Denise Richards was spotted "canoodling" with Richie Sambora, who just ended his marriage to her friend Heather Locklear. She dumped him when she found nude pictures of his assistant in his email inbox. (I think the real reason is that all of her face lifts are starting to make her look like a petrified Chihuahua dog and HE is a 46 year old man with bangs. I mean come on now!) That is not that interesting of a piece of gossip except that I KNEW ABOUT IT YESTERDAY! I love that! I had drinks with a journalist who shall remain nameless for a gossip/celebrity publication that shall also remain nameless and he told me. I like being the first to know. Although knowing said nameless journalist (his codename is "Confectionary") he probably told his roommates and several other people before he told me. Ah, well! Side note I would like to become famous enough one day that I will be caught canoodling with someone and it will matter. I don't think you can officially get caught canoodling unless you are famous anyway. If you're not famous its just calling making out.

Other interesting tidbit that was garnered at the same drinks extravaganza from another nameless source. One of the stars of a hit Showtime show is... wait for it... a total loony bitch! I won't say who and I won't say what show other than to say the title of the show rhymes with "NEEDS". Apparently several people that nameless source (code name "Precious Moments Doll") knows at Showtime fall into the total loony bitch category. But not my girl KM. I love love love her. Maybe I will become famous and be spotted canoodling with her? D'ya think?

So tonight I am probably not doing very much although my According to Wendy is at CBs Lounge at 9:00. If anyone wants to go let me know and I'll do my very best to meet you there. I had to wear fancy grown-up clothes today cuz I have a meeting with other grown-ups and they dont really know I'm a retard. Well, they probbbbbbbbbbbbbably know they're just too polite and grown-up to say anything.