Subway (Archive from October 9, 2003)

Every morning on the subway I am reminded again who I want to be and who I am not. There was a woman today with two small boys. She was maybe my age, maybe a year or two older or younger, in blue jeans and sneakers and she was wrangling the younger one, asking him to grip the pole tightly so as not to fall. Her older son was sitting as far away from her as possible, looking out the window, even after we started going through the tunnel. She pulled a bagel out of her shoulder bag and a juice box to feed them. She wiped the younger one's mouth, all the while keeping her balance and one eye on the older one. Watching all this I realized... I can't even manage to walk to work in heels without spilling coffee on my blouse.