The Wedding Gene

I would like to unite all the women in New York who are missing "the wedding gene". There are a select few of us who do not conform to the Lifetime for Women mold -- we have not been planning our weddings since we were 12, we are not holding our breath waiting for a proposal, we are not already saving for a Carolina Herrera gown. We are living in the moment. When most people say that its bullshit, but I really mean it. I am living in the moment. I like my life. I have no interest in marriage. The reason I currently don't have any interest in marriage is because there is no one I want to marry currently in my life. See how that works? It's not that I don't think it is possible for me to meet someone that I will someday want to marry. But I haven't yet. How can you plan on someone you haven't met yet? The other person is a key element of marriage. The "wedding nuts" of the world seem to forget that. They are so focused on the wedding they don't realize that WEDDINGS LEAD TO MARRIAGE which, if you do it right, should lead to FOREVER. Why are people rushing into weddings and not realizing this? Is it just that they like cake?

I should be honest here. Remember that Sex and the City episode where Sarah Jessica Parker tries on the wedding dress and breaks out in a rash. That's me. If I my ex-boyfriend even mentioned marriage I would start to hyperventilate. Once he had to actually pull the car over so I could stick my head out the window. I don't know if he figured out that I couldn't breathe because he has used the phrase "Someday when we get married... " I hope when and if I meet "The One" I won't hyperventilate anymore. But even if that happens, I am missing "the wedding gene".

I also don't like weddings because I hate "The Electric Slide" and they always play that freaking song at weddings. I think it is a symbol of the end of civilization. I could go into that a little bit more but it makes me sound crazy.